Things of late, as Terrible Cartoons, of course.


illustrations by Samara Pearlstein

I’m just going to lead with that one because it makes me happy in my optic nerves. Everyone in the wide world of Tigers fans has his or her own opinion about the team. There is naturally a great deal of disagreement. But there is one thing upon which we can all agree, one thing that may be safely and universally acknowledged as an unequivocally beautiful sight: Alex Avila, pleased with his own walk-off hit, being doused in purple Gatorade by an almost unhealthily giddy Papa Grande. It is a fine thing, a fine thing indeed.

Especially when Avila’s jersey then gets all wet and it’s all sticking to his torso and it’s a home jersey so it’s white and bits get translucent when soaked, and you get all mad at FSD for not getting longer and more torso-inclusive shots post-soaking, and now I’ve said too much. Thank you, Papa Grande.

This keeps on happening, and I suppose it too is a fine thing. Every silver lining, of course, has its cloud, and Scherzer’s high K-counts are still tagging along with the logically attendant high pitch counts, but for now we will accept it.

Doug Fister injured his groin. The jokes came thick and fast and inevitably. Everyone is just real sorry about that, Mister Fister, but what do you expect from us? We are baseball fans. We are all ten years old.

Miguel Cabrera’s ankle has been sore for a while, and Leyland is finally paying attention, giving him some DH time and just now a day off. I haven’t seen anything more specific than “sore” to describe the State of Miggy’s Ankle, aside from this Mothership blurb earlier in the month:

During the Boston series, Miguel Cabrera fouled a ball off his left shin and, as a result, the third baseman has been experiencing some “drainage” in his ankle, head athletic trainer Kevin Rand said on Sunday morning.

“He’s just getting some drainage in his ankle from that,” Rand said. “His [lower] leg gets sore just the more he’s on it.”
Jason Beck/Anthony Odoardi, DetroitTigers.com

What in the world does that mean? How can an ankle be experiencing ‘drainage’? That sounds anatomically difficult and worrying. I cannot know, I can only draw.

Drew Smyly is back! He got a spot start and should be sticking around in the bullpen even when he gets bumped from the rotation.

The persistence of Delmon Young’s mustache should be a source of concern for us all. But he has also been on a bit of a hitting tear lately. Does this… does this mean that the mustache is actually doing the hitting for him?? I think this is a possibility that we need to deeply consider. It would explain how that upper lip d├ęcor has hung around this long, despite (what must surely be) the strong recommendations of everyone who knows Delmon personally and also has eyes.

Just throwing this one in for good luck. The mantises have been back in attendance, all over MLB, and yes, they have been spotted– and occasionally photographed– in Detroit. Praise be!

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11 responses to “Things of late, as Terrible Cartoons, of course.

  1. Love your blog. This one had me laughing immediately at the first cartoon. Laughing continued while reading and seeing other cartoons. Great job. REAL praying mantises? What does this mean?

  2. A) I’m glad I’m not the only one appreciating a wet young athlete.
    B) That mantis is as large as a grown man’s torso. Yikes!

  3. Only a few things I do everyday on the net, and reading your blogs is one of them. The cartoons are outstanding and very funny, especially Delmons ‘stache. Would you mind if I posted some of your cartoons on my fantasy baseball leagues website? We are all Tiger fans and I think they would love your work.

  4. Let's Go Tigres

    I support that Avila post-dousing comment. :) Great job as always!!

  5. Simply awesome!

  6. As always, I’m cracking up! Delmon’s mustache must be responsible for his recent increased batting average because why else would he keep that thing?!

  7. The Fister drawing makes me laugh. I’m not sure why. Of course, the term “groin situation” made me laugh too.

  8. “We are baseball fans. We are all ten years old.”

    And that, ladies and gentleman, is why this is such a great game.

  9. Love, love, LOVE the mantis cartoon!

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