in which Lynn Henning gives the blogger a heart attack

AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH

AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH

Notably:

Q . Will the Tigers trade Jeremy Bonderman?

A . A personal feeling is yes. I suspect the Tigers will receive an offer too good to refuse. This team has more needs than some folks appreciate…. A 24-year-old pitcher of Bonderman’s 200-innings, 200-strikeouts status is going to command multiple players, all of which the Tigers will need if they expect to be a long-term contender.

Q . Isn’t it suicidal to trade a pitcher of Bonderman’s skills and youth?

A . A team that builds its organization around pitching will pay a price in hitters and position players. You compensate by trading one of those successful pitchers for multiple offensive players. There is risk involved, but these are the deals you must make, particularly when the Tigers could have 10 or more legitimate starters in camp when everyone reports in February.

AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
*hyperventilates*
*deep breath*
AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I think that sums up my feelings on this speculation. Except I have to say, Mr. Henning, when you talk about the Tigers having “10 or more legitimate starters in camp”, remember these two things:

1) the ever-present possibility of a pitcher Mike Marothing a joint or something at the start of the year and
2) the number of “legitimate starters” that the Red Sox had looking towards the 2006 season, and how that worked out for them.

I know we need hitting. But just chew on that a little bit.

And, Dave? Don’t trade Bondo. Unless we can get, I dunno, the key to the mystery of the so-called ‘dark matter’ permeating the universe, plus Albert Pujols or something.

4 responses to “in which Lynn Henning gives the blogger a heart attack

  1. **plugs ears**
    **rocks back and forth in chair**
    Don’t trade Bondo Don’t trade Bondo Don’t trade Bondo.

  2. I’ve never been more thrilled that Lynn Henning has absolutely no pull in the Tigers front office in my life. Henning is either crazy or he’s trying to promote interest in his articles. I don’t think you have a lot to worry about. If Bondo does get traded, maybe we can start up a support group or something. I know I’ll need it!

  3. I know it’s crazytalk, I know, but just seeing it written out in something as public as the Detroit News is enough to make me break out into hives. Then again I am insane, but still, dude. eeeeeergh.

  4. There was a stand-up comedian once -I forget who- who said that we all needed an opera singer who would hide out wherever we were (a closet, under a table, whatever) and when you were about to do or say something really stupid, he’d leap out and boom, “Mistaaaake!” and then disappear again.
    Lynn Henning needed that guy before posting that article.
    I don’t care how much everyone loves Verlander (hey, I do too), but the list of pitchers who flame out after their rookie campaigns is both long and distinguished. Bondo’s got four years in and his numbers get better every year. He absolutely shouldn’t be moved.

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