hot or not: Detroit Tigers edition


Polanco on fire, Fernando on ice, by Samara Pearlstein

Do you know what is HOT?

-Brandon Inge hitting again. Batting average creeping up! Next stop on the road to .320…. .250. You can do it, Brandon!
-Tigers getting triples in ballparks other than Comerica. Granderson is fast, and so is Guillen (when his knees aren’t broken), but still, those had to be finely hit balls to make triples. And indeed they were.
-Mike Maroth and his weeny fastball beating the mighty Johan Santana…. AGAIN.
-Placido Polanco, Placido Polanco’s bat, Placido Polanco’s at-bat music, and in fact everything about Placido Polanco right now.
-Gary Sheffield doing things that don’t involve me actively hating him and wanting him dead.
-The Racist Logos losing.
-Virgil Vasquez set to make his major league debut…. on a nationally televised game.
-Ernie Harwell coming back to make a special announcing guest appearance on May 24.
-Poking Jason Kubel in the eyeball like we all secretly want to because it was getting infuriating watching him make those catches. Poking Jason Kubel in the eyeball= hot.

Do you know what is NOT HOT?

-Jeremy Bonderman’s blister/cut on his finger/whatever he’s claiming it is today. There was a shot of him sitting on the bench today (on the Twins broadcast) between Nate and Verlander. He was PICKING AT HIS FINGER. Leave it ALONE, Bondo!
-Fernando Rodney.
-Fernando Rodney making a throwing error.
-Fernando Rodney letting in runs and rattling his psycho head again.
-FERNANDO RODNEY.

4 responses to “hot or not: Detroit Tigers edition

  1. I still believe in Fernando.

  2. Some people still believe in the Tooth Fairy too, y’know.

  3. Come on folks, Fernando’s always been like this… He has stretches where he’ll appear 10 or 12 times in a row, and his changeup is so Bugs Bunny-like, it leaves you shaking your head and saying to yourself “boy, that’s almost just not fair”, and he gets enough strikes with his fastball that he just sets ’em up, knocks ’em down, and all is right with the world. On the other hand, he often has stretches of 6-10 games where he gets a little off kilter… And it looks like he just can’t get anybody out for the life of him. Charles Dickens would title it The Tale of Two Fernandos.
    At least he managed to shake the “Four A” nickname I had for him years back (when the Bad Fernando used to show up much more often than the Good Fernando).

  4. Do you know the name of Polanco’s song for when he comes up to bat? I really like it and I don’t know where to find the name.

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