photo illustration by Samara Pearlstein
I think the Tigers are actually FINDING ways to lose now. It was bound to happen. They did a lot of winning, and now they’re bored with it, so they’ve decided to mix it up. Spice up the record a little. Get some variety in there. You know.
Tonight they chose a relatively novel form of losing: scoring more runs than some teams see in a week, and still managing to cough up the game. I know I have Jonesy producing the hairball up there, and it was MOSTLY his hairball, but make no mistake, everyone else on the pitching side of things contributed in their own special way.
Maroth coughed up some nice big home runs… airy hairballs, if you will. And Ledezma did well for a little bit before coming apart at the hairball-weakened seams. Yeah, that makes no sense, but I’m kind of losing it over here.
The offense didn’t seem to have many problems. Maggs and Polanco continued their domination of the baseball bat (7-for-9 with 6 runs scored and 3 RBI between the two of them). Granderson had another triple! Craig homered! The Mayor got some hits! Omar got some hits! Mike freakin’ Rabelo got some hits! Even Neifi Perez, NEIFI!!!! PEREZ!!!! got on base and scored a run.
Eleven runs. Eleven. And we still manage to lose? How is this a thing that is possible? No, OK, I am well aware that it is possible; we’ve just done it, and this is not the first Tigers team to do so, not by a long shot. But GAWD is it irksome. It is a hairball in my throat. It tastes bad and I keep coughing but it is lodged there and driving me NUTS with the simple fact of its existence. Go away, hairball! Go away, and don’t come back unless you’ve got a decent bullpen with you!