Jimmy Gobble lays an egg, Tigers happily consume said egg


photo illustration by Samara Pearlstein

So what do we think Jimmy Gobble did to Trey Hillman? Ran over his foot with a golf cart? Spilled ketchup on his favorite shirt? Slept with his wife? He must’ve done SOMETHING to make his coach swear bloody revenge, because the way he left Gobble out there to flounder today (not to mix bird and fish metaphors) just smacked of pure sadism.

Rod and Mario were saying that it was a message thing, like Hillman was trying to tell Gobble, “Welp, I know yer havin’ problems, kid, but you gotta figger ’em out eventually, so here ya go.” That makes sense, to a point, but the point to which it makes sense is somewhere before the ten run mark. That’s right: 10 runs.

If you missed the shenanigans, Gobble pitched the equivalent of one inning (one out in the 7th, two outs in the 8th) and gave up ten runs, ALL EARNED, on seven hits and four walks. Yeeee-owch. That’s a mighty big egg to lay. We’re talkin’ not just turkey egg (gobble!), we’re talkin’ more like ostrich egg. And Hillman just left him out there to suffer, as the inning dragged on and on and on, through 14 batters and 45 pitches. Fourteen batters in one inning. Zach Miner only faced 21 batters in six innings.

Epic.

Speaking of Miner, though, there’s a pitcher who very much did NOT lay an egg! He came up I think earlier this same day and somehow still managed to pitch his way to a quality start. Six innings, three hits, one walk, no runs? Yes please! His sinker wasn’t quite as heavy as it usually is– there weren’t nearly as many groundball outs as is usual for him– but he was effective nonetheless. The fact that he gave up only the single walk is maybe the most encouraging thing, because the last time we saw Miner, he was giving away free passes left and right. If he’s worked out his control issues (big ‘if’, as this was just one game, of course) then it’s possible our starting pitching situation is no longer QUITE so dire.

Of course it’s still relatively dire, because Kenny and Nate have been having Serious Issues lately, but if Miner can step into the rotation at least we wouldn’t be trying to limp along with only four starters any longer.

Worryingly (see, I can’t stop worrying for more than a few seconds at a time), once the Tigers were up big Leyland put in Freddy Dolsi. This was/should have been a good move, because Dolsi has had a few rough outings in a row and blah blah confidence blah blah big cushion etc. He was OK in the 7th, but was undone by the long wait in the 8th, which is where the Tigers ran into the edible Jimmy Gobble and spent like half an hour batting. When Dolsi came out to pitch in the bottom of the 8th, he just fell to pieces and eventually Leyland had to go fetch him, because he wasn’t able to get even a single out.

No big deal so far as the game was concerned; he gave up some runs, but the Tigers had already scored 19 by that point, and Aquilino was able to finish it off fairly easily. VERY big deal for Dolsi himself, though. He’s now had a bunch of bad outings in a row and he can’t be feeling too good about life, the universe, and pitching at the moment. Hopefully he won’t psych himself out.

As for the bats… well, most everyone had a great day at the plate, most especially Matt Joyce (kitten power!), Carlos Guillen, Curtis Granderson, and Miguel Cabrera. But it seems kind of cheap to give too much attention to the bats when most of the scoring was very obviously the fault of the Royals pitching, and not a result of any particular hitting prowess.

Most hilarious moment of the game: Tony Pena Jr. pitching the last inning. He was brilliant! His arm slot was all over the damn place, but he actually had some respectable velocity (low 90s!) and a little movement, including something that sure as heck LOOKED like a legitimate curveball, which he managed to use to strike Pudge out looking. I was most favorably impressed. Cat knows he can’t hit right now, so maybe he’s got a future in this. Reverse Rick Ankiel?

Tuesday’s another 8:10 pm EDT start, pitting Kenny against Kyle Davies, who I still think is on the Braves. I don’t know why, but my brain is sort of stuck on him as a Brave, and no matter how many times I see him in a Royals uniform I still cannot shake his essential Braveness from my memory. WEIRD. Go Tigers!

12 responses to “Jimmy Gobble lays an egg, Tigers happily consume said egg

  1. This is OT by now, as it’s to do with Sunday’s game, but hopefully you know the answer to this question. A friend asked me, and I don’t know coz I wasn’t paying good enough attention, and now it’s bugging me. On the game-ending play, why doesn’t Inge have a force play at third rather than making that insane throw across to first? I assume there was a good reason, or the postmortemizers would have been all over him for gratuitous hotdoggery.

  2. Miner did lay an egg… a goose egg!
    When I fell asleep the game was 7-0 and I was expecting to wake up to a similar outcome. 19-4, now that’s just ridiculous!

  3. My only disappointment is that the 4 runs made it a less good day for my fantasy team…

  4. Leslie Monteiro

    Three things:
    — Zach Miner pitched a great game. Hopefully for the Tigers, he can go on a roll and become a reliable starter. The Tigers need someone from the back end of the rotation that can get some wins.
    — I talked about the Tigers’ weaknesses as of late. I just wonder if their backend of the rotation will be good enough for them to win the division. What’s going for the Tigers is that the White Sox and the Twins are not really that good. They are good teams, but it’s not like they are invincible. If the Tigers can pull a streak like the Twins have done, they got a good shot. I don’t know if the Tigers are good enough to win in the playoffs if they get there.
    — Would someone ask me what is great about Dan Dickerson on the radio? I got to listen to him last night with the Twins being done in the second inning against the Yankees. I think he is too bland. I think Jim Price should have never lost his role as the PBP guy. He has a way of words. He describes the game well. He has great opinions. He tells it like it is. He paints the picture well. He is just fun to listen. Dickerson just does not do that for me. I am confused to why Tigers fans like Dickerson and why they hate Price.

  5. tiff, ridiculous but FUN!
    Stacey, a valid concern, because at that point the game ceases to hold much meaning in and of itself… :P
    Less, I don’t remember the exact circumstances of the play, because I was busy standing up and screaming at the top of my lungs, but I think Inge had ranged pretty far to the right to get the ball? And there would have been no one covering third, and the runner at second had probably already gotten a good start. So the out at first, with Millar and his slow ass, would have been a better bet.
    Leslie, everyone knows that starting pitching is a problem for the Tigers right now. That’s not, like, an unknown. If Miner can step in, great, but who the hell knows. As for the radio guys, I don’t know– I don’t listen to the radio that often, since Ann Arbor is a black hole of radio broadcasts, and obvs I don’t get the broadcasts in MA.

  6. ivantopumpyouup

    Inge made ESPN’s Top Plays with that one. Not too shabby.
    I grudgingly admit I was impressed with Tony PeÒa Jr. I actually didn’t realize it was the shortstop pitching until Pudge K’d. :p

  7. Just wondering–can the Spazzosaurus attack other team’s pitchers? Because Gobble certainly looked like a victim of his last night!

  8. ivan, he looked like a real pitcher! He had the goggles and the chew and everything.
    jaclyn, that’s an interesting theory… I believe the tigers-colored Spazzosaurus was team-specific, but we never really delved into that aspect of his biology, so maybe not. It would certainly be the best explanation of Gobble’s performance…

  9. ivantopumpyouup

    I was impressed by the curve he got Pudge with.
    Maybe the spazzosaurus has relatives?

  10. Well, indeed, there was a force play at 3rd for Brandon in the game-ending play on Sunday… But it was a 3-2 count with 2 outs. Everybody is off with the pitch in those situations… I remember seeing the replay with the runner basically already at or near 3rd base as Brandon was fielding, as well. Answer found.
    And, besides, the Royals deserve to be devoured by Tigers bats after starting the season 6-0 against us.

  11. Jim price is ultra annoying. That is why we do not like him. When trying to replace Ernie, which is impossible, you don’t, so you go for generic. Dan does a good job for the most part, and I try to turn down the radio when Price is doing the lineups and anything else.

  12. A whole genus of various Spazzosaurus species! This is just asking for trouble…. already my pen hand is twitching…
    Jeff, that’s what I thought, the guy at second must have been running already. And Millar, not so much with the speed. As for the Royals, ya, this must be the universe righting itself and going back to normal.
    tiff, yeah, there’s no replacing Ernie. It’s got to be a tough position to be in, though.

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