Joel Zumaya is back on the DL, contemplating subscription to "Permanent DL Living" magazine

photo illustration by Samara Pearlstein

Yes, you read that correctly: Joel Zumaya is on the DL. Again. It’s his shoulder. Again. At least this time it’s just vaguely ‘sore’ and not ‘immediately requiring surgery’, although that’s just for now.

I really wish I could say that I’m surprised by this, but I’m not. Less than 10 days ago I said this:

‘Slightly above the triceps’ is an exceedingly diplomatic way of saying ‘shoulder’.

It is also my understanding that breaking pitches are more immediately dangerous for a pitcherís elbow (at least partly due to arm rotation) while power stuff is more immediately shoulder-related (of course a pitcher can bollocks up any part of his arm with pretty much any pitch: pitching ainít good for human arms, period). So that last sentence, where Zoom reported no problems throwing any breaking balls and only felt tightness on a portion of fastballs, is not in the least tiniest way reassuring, because if he IS having shoulder problems again, I would EXPECT him to feel it on his fastballs and maybe not necessarily on his softer stuff.

At least itís not his oblique?

I hate it when I’m right about stuff like that.

It makes sense to DL Zoom right now. His last few outings his have been terrible. His WHIP is approaching 2.00. And Jim Leyland (FINALLY) does not trust him on the mound:

“I can assure you, I’m not going to have Zumaya for a while, even if everything checks out all right,” Leyland said. “All I know is there is a problem. Joel is not himself. I can see it in his face. I can see it in his demeanor.”

Asked how long Zumaya might be out, Leyland said, “Right now, I don’t feel comfortable pitching Joel. I’m not talking about because of results. I’m talking about because something is not right.

“It’s going to be next year until he gets back to 100%.”
John Lowe/Detroit Free Press

Jim Leyland, professional physiognomist.

To take Zoom’s spot in the ‘pen the Tigers have called up Francis Beltran. He can’t possibly be worse than Zoom, right? Right?


8 responses to “Joel Zumaya is back on the DL, contemplating subscription to "Permanent DL Living" magazine

  1. Could this season get ANY more depressing?

  2. God, AGAIN? Ugh… you think he came back too soon? Maybe it takes him a little longer than what’s considered normal because of the stress of his particular delivery or something.

  3. Mr Glass. That’s what we’ve taken to calling Zoom in my neck ‘o the woods.

  4. I read “physiognomist” as “physiomisogynist”.
    Man, Zoom needs to be put in a plastic bubble for his own safety.

  5. librarymonkey27

    Joel should never have been with the Tigers this year… or so early. He should still be rehabing and working on his curve and change
    and next year he will be one of the best starters in the mlb

  6. ivantopumpyouup

    Ah, I love the illustration. And that picture.

  7. Big Al, it can ALWAYS get more depressing. 2003, 2003…
    PfP, they’re saying now he tore scar tissue, which is certainly better than a new injury. I’m not sure if that’s the kind of thing that can be helped by waiting longer or not; it might be the kind of thing that more or less inevitable for a power pitcher with scar tissue all up in his shoulder joint.
    Phil, I think I had a ‘shop of Fernando as a man of glass at some point. :P
    David, I (happily) picture a hamster ball.
    librarymonkey, it’s a possibility, but in the absence of a power closer (Fernando not being the steadiest of souls, Farnsworth much the same) they will almost certainly still want to continue grooming Zoom for that position.
    ivan, the blank stare on his face was too good to not shoot. ;)

  8. black right house stay this house minor

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s