How could you do this to Armando? How?

photo by Samara Pearlstein

Poor Arrrrrrmando! He tries so hard! He knows he hasn’t been at his best this season, so he substitutes EFFORT for EASY SKILLED PITCHING, and he finally gets his effort to line up with his results and he only allows one run on one hit!

The only run he allowed wasn’t even entirely his fault! Because he had left a man on base when the upper half of the SeayLyon came in, and Bobby was the one who gave up a two-run homer and let the inherited runner score! Despite what the boxscore may say you can really only partly blame that on Armando! He pitched into the 8th inning without giving up any runs on his own!

And now his face is sad! He is making the sadface!


It’s hard to even really fault the Tigs for not hitting King Felix. He is, after all, King Felix. And Aardsma has been amazing this year. It was like the baseball scales were being balanced after Tuesday’s crazy messy homer-happy hitstravaganza; this was the pitching duel that that had utterly failed to be.

But it’s still hard to see Arrrrmando go deep into the game and allow only one single weeny little hit (granted, he also issued four walks, but you know what I mean), and not get a win for his troubles. The only good thing is that he didn’t also get a loss.

How can it get worse?

Don’t be foolish, kids and kittens, it can always get worse.

–Brandon Inge has a load of microtears in his knee tendons. They are causing him “excruciating pain”. Great. That’s just spectacular.

–Joel Zumaya may or may not be having season-ending surgery. He’s pretty much going to have to have surgery at some point, it’s just a question of doing it now and for sure killing the rest of his season, or doing it once the year’s over. I say do it now. If he tries to come back before the season’s over I would expect him to reinjure it within the month anyways.

Remember that Thursday AND Friday have 1:05 pm day games, because Friday is a double-header of Wrong Sox. I would really rather not see the Tigs go into a double-header with a loss, and I would like to see the bats be nicer to La France than they were to Armando. Tigers: let’s do this thing.

7 responses to “How could you do this to Armando? How?

  1. I love sea lions! Not so much the SeayLyon. Great play on words, Sam!

  2. You’re right that it’s hard to get mad at the Tigs for not hitting against that particular pitching combo, but man, they haven’t been hitting much lately against anyone, except for that one 9-run game. Bad kitties, bad. And poor ‘Mando… :/

  3. Sam, this is getting worser and worser. Tigers need to get/trade/bring up someone who can hit with a man on. Curtis was stranded at 3rd base again. And now the Sox (white not red) will be all pumped up from the perfect game….What’s a Tiger fan to do? We need Dombrowski magic right now.

  4. Microtear. Not something you want to hear right alongside “tendon” and “starting third baseman”… :/

  5. So let’s see… We’re now TIED for first, going into the weekend.
    And not only are we playing the team we’re tied with, as we reach a low point in the season – they’re coming off a Perfect Game.
    Great, just great.

  6. Samara Pearlstein

    Lisa, much as I’d love to, I’m afraid I can’t take credit for the SeayLion! Commenter Matt introduced the concept to me and has been (rightly) clamoring for an illustration of said beast ever since.
    FrogMan, I have just addressed this very issue. Check the new post… ;)
    Sharon, ugh, yeah, the Wrong Sox situation is like the worst it possibly can be… we’re coming off a couple close losses, and they’re coming off the high of a perfect game. Maybe they’ll get a perfect game hangover?
    PfP, noooo kidding. Now I’m spending every game worried that he’s going to snap the bloody thing…
    Heitk1le, I know. :/ COULD THERE BE ANY MORE PRESSURE ON THIS SERIES? Maybe somebody’s life is on the line too and they just haven’t told us yet. Oh wait, we already know that every time the Wrong Sox win, God kills a kitten…

  7. But if we win the South-Side Mafia may do something drastic, like hit our third baseman in the kneecaps or something…
    Oh wait. They probably needn’t bother…

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