Let’s not think about the Wrong Sox. Have YOU voted for Miguel Cabrera yet today?

photo illustration by Samara Pearlstein

If for some strange reason you have NOT yet voted a bunch of times for Miguel Cabrera, you should get right on that. It is probably the most important task you will undertake today, you don’t want to risk it falling through the cracks. Vote vote vote!

As for the game, I didn’t actually see most of it, but I didn’t really need to, now did I? I can picture it just fine. The early lull, drawing us into complacency. The gentle hope revolving around FredFred on the mound. The pleased celebration when Brennan Boesch (whom I have been writing in on all my All Star ballots, for the record) goes yard.

The slow, growing horror as it all falls apart in the 4th, only to repeat itself in the 8th. The smug awfulness of Wrong Sox fans. Magglio Ordonez’s oblique laughing from the dugout.

Yes, I can picture it all perfectly. But, you know, I don’t really WANT to picture that. So let’s all instead just imagine Miguel Cabrera and Austin Jackson frolicking about Angel Stadium in 2010 All Star Game jerseys. Group visualization time!

ETA: Ryan Perry has been placed on the DL. He has “a mild impingement around the back of his rotator cuff and some mild tendinitis around his biceps.” Impingement can result from inflammation/tendonitis too, so all his arm pain may be related. Or maybe something’s torn! Ha ha, who can say?! It’s all just a big hilarious mystery of pain and terribleness! Whee!

Enrique Gonzalez has been called up to take his spot in the bullpen. Apparently he has been starting for Toledo.

Now if only we could figure out what’s wrong with FredFred…

3 responses to “Let’s not think about the Wrong Sox. Have YOU voted for Miguel Cabrera yet today?

  1. ivantopumpyouup

    I don’t know why I put myself through the whole monstrosity of a game. I think I have issues. :/

  2. I’m still voting! I’m voting! Don’t look at me like that, Miguel!

  3. ivan, I dunno what to tell you, except that I would have put myself through the entire thing too if I had been home. I only got home in time to catch the last few innings, though. Hurray?

    FrogMan, he’s givin’ you the SIDE-EYE OF NECESSITY. Still trailing Morneau, you know!

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