Let’s hope for new cat beginnings in the new year.

image by Samara Pearlstein

Happy Rosh Hashana! Happy Eid ul-Fitr! Happy The-Tigers-Have-Won-Three-in-a-Row! This is plainly a time of great celebration for all people.

Rosh Hashana is the Jewish New Year, a holiday for happiness (we survived another one!), reflection (oh man, what did I do this past year?), and renewal (er, better do some things differently this time ’round). And eating, of course, but that’s most Jewish holidays.

It comes at a weird time for the Tigers. It’s not the start of the season. It’s not the end. The Tigers are 12.5 games back, and the wild card is coming out of the East anyways. It hardly seems like the time to contemplate fresh endings or new beginnings. Some might take this as a sign to… oh, I don’t know… concentrate on Real Life for once and leave baseball out of it, on the assumption that this is some sort of proof of the fact that baseball can’t possibly relate to all things.

Ha HA! Foolish idea. Baseball is life, life is baseball, etc.

Instead let us reflect on the fact that right now it’s a little after the September call-ups, which means there are lots of new kittens in the house! OK, most of these kittens have been up for a while due to injuries and weird position vacancy issues (e.g. second base and center) and general awfulness, but you know what I mean. Many of these cats will be a big part of The Future. The Tigers are going to be looking at them as the season winds dismally down. In many respects they are THE important part of the rest of the season, almost as important as keeping everyone else from being more injured than they already are (that’s enough, Miggy and Papa Grande).

THE FUTURE!! Like the new year, it will happen even if we don’t actively do anything to make it happen. But you aren’t supposed to just coast into the new year. You’re supposed to look back at what happened, and actively work to improve upon it in the time to come. This is exactly what the Tigers are doing right now if they’ve got any brains at all. And they have Dave Dombrowski, and also zombie Bondo, so, you know, brrrraaaaaiiiinnns.

Look back at what the kittens did this year, and what they’re doing right now, scrabbling along on a team whose best shot at doing something worthwhile is just to be as annoying as possible to the Twinkies and Wrong Sox. Evaluate those kittens. Judge them for the 5 tools: claw strength, ability to detect the sound of a tuna can opening in the next room, speed chasing a laser pointer, afternoon sunspot detection, and fluffability.

Then someone has to ask the tough questions. Is there enough kitteny fluff on the current team? Will we go with the kittens we already have, hoping they’ll be able to keep up with the real big Cabrera Tigers? Or is there insufficient fluff? Will we need to look elsewhere to up the fluffiness quotient, and if so, where do we go to pick up these cuddlemuffins? Now is the time to take a good hard look at the team and start figuring out where all these felines fit in the Near Future Plan.

In other words, the perfect Rosh Hashana frame of mind. With kittens.

So here’s to the new year! May 5771 be better for the Tigers than 5770 was.


5 responses to “Let’s hope for new cat beginnings in the new year.

  1. Wow. That was great! Love the ties between Rosh Hashana and the kitties!

  2. Happy New Year, Sam! Do you know, Everyone always says Merry Christmas on the blogs, but you Rarely see Happy RoshHashana and Happy Eid Al Fitr?? Never! I’m a Christian but I love seeing This, there should always be more Diversity in Baseball.

  3. It’s a shofar… WITH LASERS.

  4. שנה טובה


  5. !sregit oG .tfel ot thgir etirw nac I tub werbeH ro cibarA ni etirw t’nac I.

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