illustration by Samara Pearlstein
Will Rhymes hit his first big league home run! In a big league ballpark! With a big league baseball bat! In a big league baseball game, against a big league pitcher! Zack Greinke, even! Exclamation points!!!
I don’t have much else to say about this game, as I did not actually see it, because I was watching the Red Sox lose to the Orioles at Fenway. I guess it wasn’t pretty, but a W is a W. EAT IT, .500!
(Another Tigers win while RotT is at Fenway… time to start the ‘Mr. Ilitch pays RotT to go to every single Red Sox home game next summer’ campaign right now.)
The only other thing I have to contribute is this text message conversation between me and my brother. I had been keeping an eye on the out of town scoreboard at the ballpark, and was pleased to see that the Tigers were winning… until I noticed that, very suddenly, they were not.
RotT: Wtf is FredFred doing??
RotT brother: Well I’ll tell you what he’s not doing, and that’s pitching well in a meaningless game.
And then I had to explain the origin of the FredFred nickname to my Red Sox fan seatmate. So… I don’t know if I had a point there. Oh, right. DON’T DO IT AGAIN, FREDFRED. Not when the games matter, anyways. OK? OK. Great. I’m glad we’ve got that settled.