illustrations by Samara Pearlstein
Each spin of the dreidel represents four possible outcomes. Perhaps each spin of the dreidel represents a branching of universes. You will experience only one universe, say the one where the dreidel comes up gimel and you get to take all the goodies. Three alternate universes* are spawned at this moment: one where the dreidel comes up nun (you do nothing), one where it comes up hai (you get half the loot), and one where it comes up shin (you add a piece to the communal pile).
Max Scherzer can see multiple outcomes at once because of his magical eyes, so it is fair to say that he can see into multiple universes. Max Scherzer sees the multiverse! Thanks Science! Thanks Dreidel!
Latkes are not the only food traditionally eaten during Chanukah. The important bit is not the potato, but the fact that it is fried in oil, since oil plays a major role in the Chanukah story. Many Jews (especially in Israel) also eat donuts fried in oil to celebrate greasy Chanukah goodness.
Gerald Laird eats the donuts, because Gerald Laird.
Happy fourth and fifth nights, everyone! Oh, and I guess that other thing is happening too, right? Merry Christmas to you lot too.
*I should say, at least three alternate universes. There are really an infinity of alternate universes being spawned at all times, as molecules take different paths, different neurons fire, in one universe your game of dreidel is interrupted by the cat slapping it off the table, etc.