Closing the book on Carlos Guillen.

photos and illustrations by Samara Pearlstein

Carlos Guillen was a veteran of 14 seasons, a three-time All Star, a Tiger for 8 years, and a non-roster invitee with the Mariners this spring. He was injured approximately 10,439 times over the course of his Tigers career. He was extremely good in 2004 and very good in 2006. He has a small chin and large ears. Now he is no more so far as MLB is concerned. Carlos Guillen has announced his retirement.

Remember the good times, Detroit friends.

The high socks times.

The touching times.

The zombie times.

The IKEA times.

The bathing in horseradish mash times.

The beached times.

The derpy times.

The derpy times.

The derpy times.


11 responses to “Closing the book on Carlos Guillen.

  1. Ah Carlos, you were so hard to assemble but how the children enjoyed you on Christmas morning!

  2. Also, remember the showing up Jered Weaver times. :)

  3. I saw an article somewhere that suggested Carlos should go into managing, like his fellow Venezuelan Guillen, Ozzie. If he does, I hope I never see Carlos going off on a post-game rampage, though. It would ruin my image of him as the strong, silent type who just happens to make goofy faces a lot.

    … And show up Jered Weaver. That memory is almost as fun as Magglio taking Huston Street deep in ’06.

  4. First Posada, now Guillen. The chinless wonders are dropping out of MLB like flies! Dying flies!

  5. Ah, thanks for posting this! I felt since Guillen had all the injuries, lots of bashing would be going around. This gave me a smile!

    Carlos was may favorite (now I need a new Tiger!). My favorite memory was a grand slam against the Yankees and his high batting average against the White Sox. Oh… and all the cool bling he sported around his neck.

  6. Definitely the “making Weaver lose his entire team’s crap” times. Also the 3:30 am walk-off after a rain delay. :)

    Great memories, Carlos. Enjoy a healthy and non-broken retirement.

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