the terrible game of terribleness


photo by Samara Pearlstein

No sense in beating around the outfield shrubbery here: Brandon Inge has a broken bone in his hand and will miss 4-6 weeks.

NooooOOOOOoooOOOOOooOOOOOOoooOooOooOOoOOOOooooooooooooo!

In case you missed it, he tripled early in the game. It was majestic, spectacular, awe-inspiring, etc. Actually it bounced out of Nelson Cruz’s glove against the wall, but nobody should feel bad about that. Yesterday the Racist Logos got an inside-the-park home run when Rhino fell through an unlocked door. So it goes.

Anyways, his next time up, Inge got hit in the hand. I don’t know if Feldman was pitching him inside because of the triple, or if he just lost all semblance of control, but it was a 90+ mph fastball and it got Inge just below his left pinky finger. He reacted badly right away but went to first, where he refused to touch it and tried to act like a manly man. When they finally got him out of the game, they immediately sent him off for X-rays, which revealed the break.

Now is the hour of Don Kelly’s awakening. But I cannot even get properly fake-excited about this, because NO NOT OUR PRECIOUS LITTLE BRANDON INGE, NOOOOOO.

THEN Austin Jackson slammed a baseball back up the middle, right into the head of Rangers reliever Dustin Nippert. Scary stuff, and Dustin Nippert was all: sadface.

They took him to the hospital as a precaution, but he never lost consciousness and the Rangers training staff apparently thinks he’s going to be OK. This is, of course, extremely lucky. It could have been a whole lot worse.

Then poor Enrique Gonzalez, who had been up in the THIRD INNING when Bondo was struggling, had to stand up and pitch the 14th. Of course he struggled and lost it. He had started warming up literally hours before! What did we think was going to happen, miracles and rainshowers of candy? NO. NO CANDY AT ALL.

PS: Andy Oliver out, Arrrrrrrmando in.

PPS: Happy birthday, Phil Coke. Sorry nobody could get you a win on your special day. At least you personally did not give up any runs?

14 responses to “the terrible game of terribleness

  1. Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

    (But I’m glad Andy Oliver has been sent down. Ugh.)

  2. Let me pre-apologize to all of his fans. And I realize this is unkind. But I’m so done with Carlos Guillen. He is a totem pole at 2nd (which cost us a precious run tonight), and a GIDP (and DL entry) waiting to happen. It’s time to cut losses. Now.

    And it doesn’t help that Ingeless the Tigers are slouching toward Clownshow.

  3. ivantopumpyouup

    //PPS: Happy birthday, Phil Coke. Sorry nobody could get you a win on your special day. At least you personally did not give up any runs?//

    :/

    I’m amused you had a Dustin Nippert sadface at the ready. I shouldn’t be surprised!

  4. “I don’t like taking a day off,” Inge said. “This is going to crush me.”

    From Yahoo: http://sports.yahoo.com/mlb/teams/det/report#notes_quotes

    Color me crushed as well.

  5. -First thing that popped in my head when they said Inge got his hand broken: “Sam is going to be in tears. That’s her favorite!”
    -Happy Birthday Mr. Soft Drink!
    -Kinda figured Oliver Twist would be going down.
    -Let’s just make sure that Arrrrrrrrrmando doesn’t try any retaliation tonight. We know what happened when FredFred did it against the Red Sox :) (even though it wasn’t intentional)
    -Any ideas on who would be called up in place of Inge? Triple A has no 3rd baseman labeled on their roster, but I do recognize Jeff Larish as a possible candidate. Any thoughts?

  6. Brandon :(

    I wouldn’t mind seeing Larish. He has been tearing it up in triple-A.. per usual..

  7. Guillen at third, Sizemore at second?!?
    That’s crazy – but it might just be crazy enough to work…

  8. The pessimist in me says that flushing sound you hear is the rest of our season going down the toliet.

    The optimist says, Polanco was out about that long when he separated his shoulder in 2006 – and that worked out okay.

    • ivantopumpyouup

      In ’06 they had Neifi!!! to play second though. Someone is going to be playing out of position to fill in the hole at third.

      :/

  9. Thus ends his march to overtake Lou Whitaker as the all-time Tigers K king, at least until 2011. Unless he can manage to strike out 49 times in the last month or so.

  10. mow. so sad. and guillen certainly didnt help last night.

  11. That looked like it hurt badly when I saw it on TV last night. Hopefully Brandon has a speedy recovery and is on the field soon, so you can see your #1 Tiger again. I hope that Dustin Nippert will be okay, as well.

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